Sweet, sweet fantasy (with guest blogger K Web)

My brother has always been a much bigger football fan than me. I’m not sure what it is about it that he loves so much, but I suspect it has something to do with the all-day nature of the game and built-in lounging opportunities that it provides. Below, my big brother and first guide to the weird world of professional sports shares some thoughts on the phenomenon known as Fantasy Football, a virtual competition that has 18 million participants in the U.S. alone and that is probably responsible for as many wasted hours of life as reality TV or Facebook. But let’s let a fan explain its appeal, shall we?

Fantasy Football. Maybe you’ve heard of it? Maybe someone you know plays? But what is it?

Well, Fantasy Football is many things: a game, an obsession, a waste of time. Yes, it is all of the above, but, what you may not know is that it is actually very emotional.

What? Emotional? Well, yes!

You see, Fantasy Football is an online game hosted through various websites (ESPN, Yahoo!, CBS, etc.) where players (otherwise known as General Managers or GMs) sign up to form a league. Once a league is formed, a draft takes place before the season starts with GMs selecting players, just like in a real sports league. The teams then compete against each other throughout the year. Various statistical categories like touchdowns, passing yards, and rushing yards are added together to form a final score. The team with the most points at the end of every week (you guessed it) wins!

But unlike other pools where people pick players to form a team and there are no changes throughout the year, in Fantasy, a team is in constant flux. GMs can add players to their team, drop players, and even make trades.

And this is where it gets interesting because a GM, like a young mother, will nurture and build his (or her) team. One guy isn’t doing so great? Drop him! Another guy is hot… Pick him up! Like a guy on someone else’s team? Make a trade! In this way, GMs live through success and failure just like a real team, and just like a parent watching little Jimmy play soccer. If your team sucks, you’re an idiot for making the wrong moves, and people in your league will let you know about it. If your team wins, you’re a genius for making all the right decisions, and you bask in glory.

I’ve been playing Fantasy Football for 7 years now. There have been times when, all alone, I’ve jumped out of my seat and run around my apartment a-hootin’ and a-hollerin’ so loud that the neighbours probably heard. Touchdown dances, complete with inappropriate gyrations, have been performed. Other times, I’ve felt sick to my stomach, unable even to plow through my usual game-day bag of Jalapeño & Cheddar Doritos.

I’ve been happily married for two years and I can honestly say Fantasy Football has been one of the biggest issues in the relationship. I need to watch my team. I’m happy when my team wins, despondent when they lose. “Hold on honey, my running back is on the field” has been a constant refrain. “It’s so nice outside, do you want to go for a walk?” “Um…don’t you know it’s Sunday?” has been a conversation had many times - that is, at least, when I have enough energy to actually form sentences instead of simply grunting. Fantasy Football is draining that way.

Of course, the best thing about Fantasy Football is it makes the games more interesting. We all know the NFL can be boring at times. Who wants to see the 4th quarter of a blowout on Monday Night? But…if you have a player in the game, and need a touchdown to win your Fantasy matchup for the week, all of a sudden that 4th quarter garbage time can become VERY interesting.

Get that touchdown dance ready – tomorrow is Sunday.